Dear Santa,

Yeah, I know what you’re thinking, that I’m pretty greedy, asking for presents right after Christmas (thanks for the iPod, btw, it was just perfect), Or that I’m too old to still believe in you. Or both. But hear me out, will ya?

This is a letter for next year. I’m giving you a whole year to work on it, because I want a really special gift, and I don’t think that even with your or your elves superior skills in the workshop, that you can get this custom-made job done overnight.

Next Christmas, Santa, I want a boyfriend. I’ve been really good, for a really long time. You’ve gone and given every other girl a boyfriend, financé, husband, and I think I’ve been patient long enough. I deserve one. And more importantly–he deserves me. I know that I’m a really good catch – I’ve got brains and can crack a joke and am redheaded to boot! I’d make an excellent girlfriend. I know that wasn’t the case in the past–I was much too insecure and socially awkward. Yeah, I would have been pretty lousy about it. But you’ve seen how I’ve changed and I think it’s time.

So, I hate to admit this, Santa, especially since you’re going to be so nice and give him to me, but he can’t just be any boyfriend. He has to be special, and made for me. I mean, I know my grandma told me to stop being picky and just marry anybody as long as he was a good man, but I just don’t think I’m quite that desperate yet. I’m attaching the list of what I want, so you can get him to the right specifications, but I’ll allow you some leeway in the color of the eyes–I do want to be surprised!

See, I told you, it wasn’t too hard. And believe me, I want to make it easy for you. So if creating him all at once is too difficult, I’m more than willing to take him as a work-in-progress.

And Santa? I’m all for celebrating Christmas in July. 😉

Julia

CC: Big Man of the Universe