Maybe it was the National Geographic on the coffee table about the solar system. Or pretty pictures like this from the Hubble spacecraft that make my mouth gape in wonder. Or the fact that I’ve rediscovered my love for ST:Voyager and it’s making me nostalgic (how much nostalgia can one of 26 really have before it become pathological?) and I’m exposing that geeky side…

But I really really want a telescope. Not a big fancy one (yet), but one that if I squinted, I could pretend that I was seeing the rings around Saturn.

I don’t suppose any of my illustrious friends out there know anything about telescopes? *wistful* Yeah, it’s a long shot.

****

Started a new rotation today. Psychiatry. I’m still a little too disturbed to start sharing the funny stories. When my attending starting telling me about our patients–the one that they had to so heavily sedate because he attacks everybody, or the one who wouldn’t eat anything because she was convinced that we were feeding her our children, or the one, in for a suicidal attempt and talks about how she watched her mother raped and murdered in front of her eyes and then was raped by her uncle at 6… Not to mention those with the sexual disinhibitions. And on and on. Within minutes, I was wide-eyed and twelve again, the small-town girl caught in big-city traffic.

It might be a long six weeks.

****

On a good note–I did *finally* mange to meet up with the Neurology guy who I’ve wanted to be my advisor! We got a schedule for fourth year cobbled together (I may not have ruined my chances for residency after all!) and right after, I ran into the other doctor that I’m hoping to get a letter of recommendation from (yes, I ended the sentence with a preposition–whatcha going to do about it?!). After weeks of not getting ahold of anybody, everything is starting to come together. Whee!

P.S. A big big welcome and hug to my latest friend donnazita who ironically, is my oldest e-friend. We met 6 (no way!) years ago because of a a just-becoming known actor, Ewan McGregor, and our love for him was the building bridge to our friendship.

Sick. Still sick.

It’s migrated from my throat to my ears and head now.

And it’s really really hard talking to patients and their families when you have no voice.

Pity me? Send me lemon tea and chocolate to make me feel better?

And Ellie, I just heard. I didn’t get the rotation in Kenya, so I won’t be within a thousand miles of you next January. Chris didn’t get it either, so we’re thinking about arranging something together, so hopefully, we can still somehow meet. (I still want a picture).

Becks, you are having way too much fun with match.com. Save me some of the action! Fill me in with your favorites, k? Hopefully, I’ll be back to my chipper self soon.

*crawls back into bed*

They do have chipper as a mood!

Please don’t ask me why I’m chipper. I’m sure if you asked me to analyze it, I would find out that I really am not so. My ankle hurts. My non-existant ab muscles hurt. I spent all afternoon hanging around a tiny office with 5 other doctors, so I could exam 2 patients. (So. Painfully. Boring.)

Yep, started a new rotation, pediatrics, which I have been excited for, but stuck in clinic has kinda sapped me of the glee. I was looking forward to doing well baby checks and looking into kid’s stuffy noses, but I can’t stand just sitting around in a too-small room and changing attendings every half day! Thankfully, this does not count towards evaluations. And it should get better. I hope it gets better.

Only three more rotations and I’ll be done with third year!

Only three more rotations and I’m done with third year. When you really think about it, it’s scary. I went to a med school party this weekend, where I mingled with so many of my classmates that I haven’t seem in months. And it hit me. In just a year and a bit, we’ll be separating and spreading across the country… These close friendships and associations will end. I can’t stop it, and even though it’s so far in the future, that black dread is taking over residence in my stomach.

Hey, come back here chipper feeling!

No, things are good. Really. I just won’t let myself think how miserable my life is going to be when Chris and I are on opposite coasts. 🙁

I am such a nerd. No, really, it’s true. How did I spend my evening? My wonderful evening free of responsibility? Not to mention Valentine’s Day?? Reading articles from the latest Grand Rounds. I discovered this a couple of weeks ago, and I have to admit, when I read these blogs, written by actual doctors talking about real patient encounters, or just the science behind our bodies (they’ve figured out the genetics of why people have different sleep habits??? how cool is that!) I get so excited. Medicine is definitely my calling. Marissa, you should check some of it out–it’s written for the layman, and might give you an idea of the field.

Is tomorrow a new episode of GG? I haven’t seen the previous two yet (oops), but I still plan to and would like to tape it if it is.

And speaking of GG, can I do a bit of shameless plugging? Of course, ff.net messed up half of my formating (they’re taking out commas before quotation marks now!) and I’m not in the mood to go back and change it by hand, so believe me, it really doesn’t have nearly the number of errors in RL.

I’ve had to go through and make all most of my journal friends only. I had been planning on it, but I got friended by a rather, um, unsuitable person. And I really don’t need stalkers. 😉 Unless, of course, you guys want to stalk me, and if that’s the excuse it takes you to come out and visit me, then by all means, I give you my blessing.
.

Geez, after this randomness, you’re going to be begging me not to keep my promises!

*hugs* to flist.

Because I haven’t updated on my life forever, I owe a catch-up journal.

Since we last (truly) saw Julia, she was in the midst of her neurosurgery block, wondering what in the world she had gotten herself into. The hours were long, she limped home every night, and nary a resident acknowledged her existence. I fear many night, she cried herself to sleep, as the sleep-deprivation added to the stress. But, luckily that rotation only last two weeks, and by the end, she had made friends with two residents (one, very very cute, but rather too crass for her taste) and had impressed the attendings with random knowledge about a genetic disease that she knows all too well from personal experience. In fact, she had so much fun, that she almost convinced herself that maybe she could do surgery for the rest of her life, and never seen the sun for the next 8 years and have no personal life. Well maybe not quite. However, time goes by (…you’re older than you ever were and now you’re even older, and now you’re even older… and even two long 5-hours-of-sleep-per-night weeks end, and we all must move on.

Our heroine, as you remember, managed to wheedle/cry/whine her way into neurology rotation. She had had inklings since the previous year, when none of her classes had intrigued her quite as much as the study of the brain did (I hear that she actually spent 6 hours a day studying–even when there wasn’t a test the next day!), that perhaps a career in neurology might be nice, and while she was determined to keep an open mind when approaching her rotations, that little niggle of a thought was always there. Radiology was boring–except when she studied brain MRIs. Surgery, dreadful on the feet–but the cases were cool.

So needless to say, she approached the neurology clerkship with more than a hint of excitement.

Two days into it, she had found her calling. She tells me that she loves being with the patients and her neuro exam, while still jerky (and yes, she still forgets to check eye movements), is improving and she can’t wait for clinic each morning, and, yes, the rumor is true, she stayed late on her birthday because she *wanted* to learn more about multiple sclerosis.

Of course, it still is too early to call–she has been known to be mighty fickle at the last moment, but you may be talking to a future neurologist here!

A big thanks and snuggles to my flist for their birthday greetings! *hugs* You are all fabulous, and every day I am thankful for the chance of knowing you and claiming you as friends.