I am truly fascinated by this thing called the Internet…

Today, I was wasting time (my favorite past-time) exploring LJ looking for some Star Trek: Voyager icons (unfortunately good ones seem to be a particularly rare species) and just started clicking on links taking me to different people’s journals.

It’s astonishing how much people reveal of their lives… some blatantly, others in obscure threads throughout their posts. I mean, granted I talk a lot about my personal life–but a good portion of it is put into friend posts–where I can control who sees it.

What’s more amazing is that some of them don’t seem bothered by the fact that they have 500 people that they don’t know reading and commenting on their day to day lives… Take for example epicyclical. I stumbled onto her journal because it’s the personal/HP LJ of the woman who wrote the hilarious “Very Secret Diaries of LOTR.” Her “friends of” list has 2706 people!!

I like it that people are so honest with strangers. It makes me feel good about this world–that (at least when there’s some anonymity) we do allow others to see exactly who we are. I find it fascinating.

On that note: how many of you have RL people reading your journal? Does it make you write different things than you normally would?

A particular gem from http://www.thisfish.com. Her motto is the best:

It’s lovely to be a feminist and all. I have gotten in plenty a tizzy over the inequity of the female role in this bizarre universe. Have even tried out the independent, “A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle” track, and been quite good at it. Eventually, however, I settled upon this conclusion:

This fish needs a bicycle.

If not for comfort, at least for entertainment’s sake.

I think I am such a fish too…

~~~~~~

(Since I seem to need updating before I ever get an entry posted)

Spent the evening in tears.

Now, now, don’t get worried. I wasn’t (entirely) depressed or heart-broken. In fact, I paid money for these tears.

I just saw Howard Shore conduct his Lord of the Rings Symphony!! With a full choir and children’s choir. A young soprano male with the voice of an angel. And a background of the art and sketches of Alan Lee and John Howe.

I got emotional walking into the hall (a big feat for me actually–am terrified of building and I went alone) where a small group of musicians performed the Fellowship theme. And it just got better from there. It was amazing seeing it “live”–the artwork was amazing and part of it felt like this must have been when HS was first writing it–just going off the artists’ ideas.

Got teary during the sweet Shire music. Cried during the Fellowship themes. And openly bawled during Into The West. Wearing mascara was not the best idea. Looked like raccoon.

Only one complaint: it was too short!

Sometimes, you just need a moment to remember who you are… who you were…

I just got back from my grandparent’s. Their house hasn’t changed much–books are still piled all over, mixed with my grandmother’s knitting and writing projects, and Grandpa’s newspapers. The “willow” tree out front, where we cousins used to dress up and play “Little House on the Prairie” (I was Ma, ’cause I was the oldest. And my sister Laura was usually Laura, even though she was the youngest.) is larger now–we could no longer use the split in the trunk as a table. But there are still cats prowling around and apples in the orchard and swallow nests on the front porch.

Magic still lingers there.

My grandparents are getting old now. Late 70s with white hair and ill health. But Grandpa is already getting his snowmobile ready, at just the mention of an early winter. And Grandma has so many projects that I think she keeps to defend herself against death–she can’t go until it’s organized for her posterity.

I spent three days talking with my grandma about politics and religion, family and ancestors, art and poetry. We talked a lot about writing. I confessed that I still write when I can (although I don’t think she understood what fanfiction was).

Grandma writes–essays, short stories and poetry. It’s her poetry that I like the most.

PERSPECTIVES

Meme stolen from kimarama ” When you see my poem, you post a poem, too. I don’t make the rules people.” I went on a hunt for poems, because my favorite poetry book has gone missing and stumbled across this one. And I’ve been in a really sentimental mood recently, so, I’m sharing it.

Like Anne Shirley’s House

I want a house that lifts itself
from the ground with a porch
like the lap of an apron
made to hold me in wicker.
The floor will be fir, clear
vertical grain; cut, milled,
shipped down from the north,
painted over each spring
semigloss gray — deck gray
it will say on the can.

People will come to a porch
composed around
the private dignity of a house
open to friends.

It will have corners for secrets.
The trellised west side
dripping rampant vine, flowering
frantic with bees in July,
a niche for the intimate glance
as amethyst deepens to violet
and the small wild loves of earth
sing out its rhythm
as if the whole country round
were gliding to bliss on rockers.

Faye George from Back Roads

It is a … jolting experience to go to the wedding reception of the man you dreamed your whole life to marry.

I’m not sure yet if I recommend it to anyone.

His walk is different… the army trained that patent saunter out. And his voice no longer carries the hint of Australian drawl that he obtained the two years he lived there (thankfully–that voice was irresistible enough). But he hasn’t changed much in looks and I had these weird feelings of being trapped between two “me”s. Folks, I think we just succeeded in time-travel. And it’s not pleasant.

We have nothing to talk about anymore. That helps. He didn’t even ask me anything about what was going on in my life, so I didn’t even have the opportunity to flaunt my successes (well, not really, flaunt per se)… Maybe that’s what I’m most bummed about. I spent most of the reception talking to *her* parents and sisters (one of them is a good friend of mine… Why does the world always have to be small when it concerns him??). They were nice and it passed the time, talking about what I do.

His bride is nice. Cute, but not so unbearably beautiful that you keep wondering if he only married her for her looks. She seems sweet, but I do admit to stifling a disbelieving glance when he stated proudly that she now sells Mary Kay products. Just another sign.

All is good. I survived and wished them sincere, hearty congratulations.

And that’s that.

One of the greatest things I’ve ever seen on eBay:

Going, going… not gone!

Best of all, nobody bought it the first time. So it’s yours if you want it!

*shakes head*

*****

Spent my Friday night contemplating my lonely existence and watching a documentary on Gene Kelly. *sigh* They just don’t make them like him anymore.

And…. am I the only one who thinks that Milo was on the last GG episode??? I swear I saw him as a extra. In the scene where Lorelai and Sookie are gushing about having the day off, and just right before they get to Dean and Lindsay’s (so convinently located) apartment, they pass by a girl and a guy with dark wild hair, wearing a black leather jacket, sitting and drinking coffee. I swear it was him!! Obviously, he came to visit Alexis on the set, and presto! Now, if only he’d stay permanently. Or I need to work on controlling those delusions more!