Dear Santa Claus,

I do hope you’re doing well. I was a little bit worried because I hadn’t heard any response from my letter last January (exactly 9 months ago), but bjorks_defender assured me that I probably caught you on your much needed vacation in the Caribbean, and that it probably got lost in the post-Christmas complaints. So I thought I’d better check in, and see how you and the elves were doing with creating me that boyfriend.

I have to admit, I’ve been a little bit disappointed. Right after I wrote you, Matt took center stage in my awareness, and I was certain that you were moulding him for me. He seemed exactly like my specifications–you even gave him intense blue eyes that sparkled when he look at me, just me! But disappointment followed disappointment, and before I realized it, another girl had claimed him as her present. I don’t know what she bribed you with (I gave you cheese! That’s what the commercial said you liked best!), but Santa, I expected better than that from you. I don’t want to hear that she was just breaking him in for me and that he’s free now–I’m not sure that I’m desperate for hand-me-downs.

But perhaps I’m being to hasty in judgment. Perhaps, you have been working hard with your little elves in Santa’s Workshop and are not ready to reveal him until he’s perfect. If that’s the case, I’ll be patient and wait until Christmas. Maybe. Going to God is seeming like a good alternative right now.

In any case, we do have a deadline coming up. Remember, there’s only 3 and a half months before Christmas–I won’t be very understanding if he’s late.

Lots of love,

Julia