It is a … jolting experience to go to the wedding reception of the man you dreamed your whole life to marry.

I’m not sure yet if I recommend it to anyone.

His walk is different… the army trained that patent saunter out. And his voice no longer carries the hint of Australian drawl that he obtained the two years he lived there (thankfully–that voice was irresistible enough). But he hasn’t changed much in looks and I had these weird feelings of being trapped between two “me”s. Folks, I think we just succeeded in time-travel. And it’s not pleasant.

We have nothing to talk about anymore. That helps. He didn’t even ask me anything about what was going on in my life, so I didn’t even have the opportunity to flaunt my successes (well, not really, flaunt per se)… Maybe that’s what I’m most bummed about. I spent most of the reception talking to *her* parents and sisters (one of them is a good friend of mine… Why does the world always have to be small when it concerns him??). They were nice and it passed the time, talking about what I do.

His bride is nice. Cute, but not so unbearably beautiful that you keep wondering if he only married her for her looks. She seems sweet, but I do admit to stifling a disbelieving glance when he stated proudly that she now sells Mary Kay products. Just another sign.

All is good. I survived and wished them sincere, hearty congratulations.

And that’s that.

One of the greatest things I’ve ever seen on eBay:

Going, going… not gone!

Best of all, nobody bought it the first time. So it’s yours if you want it!

*shakes head*

*****

Spent my Friday night contemplating my lonely existence and watching a documentary on Gene Kelly. *sigh* They just don’t make them like him anymore.

And…. am I the only one who thinks that Milo was on the last GG episode??? I swear I saw him as a extra. In the scene where Lorelai and Sookie are gushing about having the day off, and just right before they get to Dean and Lindsay’s (so convinently located) apartment, they pass by a girl and a guy with dark wild hair, wearing a black leather jacket, sitting and drinking coffee. I swear it was him!! Obviously, he came to visit Alexis on the set, and presto! Now, if only he’d stay permanently. Or I need to work on controlling those delusions more!

Just popping in to say I’m alive and well.

I changed rotations, finished with Internal Medicine last week. I was so sad to see it go, because I had such a great time. It’s definitely on the list of career possibilities–however, I have another 6 weeks of it next spring, so I’ll hold off until then to make my decision. It has everything that I like–the patient interaction, getting to see neat cases (I saw a guy with mercury poisoning… it was so cool!) that I’ve only read about in textbooks, making medical decisions, the integration of all different fields…

So, now I’m radiology…. and I miss Internal Medicine even more. I decided to postpone my surgery rotation because of the problems with my shoulder and so I’m doing a 4th year elective. I’m the only third year–and because of that, I have the residents convinced that I’m a gunner and going into radiology. One resident practically told me that I HAD to get honors. I don’t like having that kind of pressure. I like to do a good job, I’m trying to do a good job, but please don’t expect me to blow you away!

It’s been *interesting* so far. Everyday, I go to work, where I sit in a darkened room and stare at a computer screen trying to differentiate between grey blobs. I have 4 hours of lecture of day, where I sit in a darkened room staring at a Power Point presentation, trying to differentiate between grey blobs. I have fallen asleep at every noon lecture. And I was 45 minutes late today, because I could not make myself care enough to get there in time to just fall asleep, when I could be having much better sleep in my own bed.

No, it’s going better than the first day (I seriously thought I was going to die), and it certainly is more enjoyable now that I can identify a few more grey blobs (I’m getting good at the pancreas!), so we’ll see. Maybe I’ll be singing it’s praises by the end. 🙂

I’ve just been taking it easy for the last few days… I went to the library and got fiction books for the first time since at least May (stayed up way too late last night reading Sorcery and Cecelia by Patricia Wrede… maybe that’s why I’m tired?), and Ellie shirerain and I spent a couple of days playing around with my layout journal, which I lovelovelove. All of the pretty colors is because of her. The painting is by James C Christensen, who is one of my favorite artists of all times. All of his paintings are whimsical and breathtaking and for a moment, convince me that I do believe in magic. And he puts flying fish in half of his art too, can you get any cooler?

Toodles!

Pssst…. If any of you have not checked out teh_music, may I suggest that you hie there immediately? I’ve gotten such great music that I have not been able to get my hands on… *contented sigh*

Desperate times and all of that…

I haven’t been able to write a word for months now. Granted I’ve been consumed with real life school and work. But I haven’t even been able to come up with ideas to pursue. And that’s not normal.

So I’m giving to you an opportunity, to throw down the gauntlet and challenge me.

Pick any fandom (and if it’s one that I’m not familiar with, we’ll try again), any person or couple (ditto) and give me an idea that you want a story written about. Quotes or song lyrics are fine, although I’d like to have more of an idea of what they make you think of than just “Oh, I love this song.” Specifics would be fabulous, since I really want some direction. And I will write something for it… At least a drabble, but probably no more than 1000 words.

Let see if this gets my keyboard turbocharged!

Remember the Julia way back in April and May, who was so scared for third year that she more than once just considered quitting, debt or no debt?

I don’t even recognize her anymore.

There’s no doubt in my mind that this is where I’m supposed to be. Every day I’m reminded why I love medicine so much. It’s the best feeling in the world, knowing that yes, while I’m clumsy and still gawky, I love doing this, I can do this, and yes, other people believe that I can do it too.

I’m on internal medicine right now, which is basically taking care of ill patients in a hospital setting. As long as they’re not dying or we’re concerned that they could die (those people are in the ICUs), they come to us. Everything that I learned in class last year, yep, I’ve gotten a patient with it. I guess I should have studied glomerular nephritis a little harder, eh?

Just to give you a clue into the workings of the hospital (I had no idea before I started), I’m work with a team of another medical student (detour: I really miss working with Chris!), two interns (about two months post-med school graduates), a resident and one of three attending physicians (licensed, qualified phyisican) that rotate every week or so, The attendings are hospitalists, which means he basically admits and takes care of any one sick in the hospital who’s not needing surgery and those patients get passed down to us.

The first week was dull. Really dull. Our team hardly admitted anyone, I sat around a lot, clueless as to what exactly I was supposed to be doing and just feeling like I was wasting my time. But slowly, the patients starting trickling in and I started getting more involved with their care, and it’s been fabulous since then. I’ve had more than one patient actually think that I was their doctor… of course, I straightened that out really quickly, but it was a nice feeling to think that others thought I was competent enough.

And the last couple of days, I’ve taken on enough responsibility that I’m functioning as an mini-intern. I’m deciding the plan of actions and ordering tests (all of this discussed at great length with the attending of course!) and I’m admitting patients and doing their history and physical, then making sure that everything is arranged for their discharge when that happens. I think my interns and residents like me, and my attending told me that I was doing a great job… I seriously danced around my car after that.

I didn’t mention that my attending is hot, did I? The kind of geeky athletic hotness that wows me every time. I seriously doubt that he’s a day over 30 (yes, that my friends, is still young to me!) and looks younger. Of course, he sort of has a girlfriend, but that’s so easily forgettable. Me likes eye candy. Hence part of the reason for the dancing.

Chris is on psych right now and having a terrible time. His resident is a pain and apparently has depression, and he really hates the “medicate them up!” attitude–his parents are both psychologists with thriving therapy practices, so I think he has seriousy misgivings about the overuse of antipsychotic drugs. I think he’s found one specialty to completely cut off the list! I only get to see him about one a week, but we talk every couple of days, so it’s not too bad.

Not much else going on with me. I tried really really really hard to get LNB finished before you headed off to college, Marissa, but it didn’t work. Maybe a Christmas present?

Wow, actually a happy post from Julia, with no blubbering? Amazing! Folks, this is a once in a lifetime occurrence here!

I think I’ve lost the ability to breath.

Erik’s engaged.

Even writing the words hurts more than it should, and I can’t look at them again. I’m just sitting here, blinded by my eternal patheticness.

I don’t know even how to explain how I feel. I shouldn’t feel so strongly. I haven’t seen him for two years and I haven’t been in love with him for a while now. I finally grew past that. I’m not good at letting go, but Erik I’ve never wanted to let go, not completely.

He was my first crush, my first love. I fell for him in the eighth grade because he went to Norway and came back and had all of these exciting stories. He was cute, he was funny, he was super nice to me, treated me as a friend, and I adored him. I knew his strengths, his weaknesses and I loved everything about him. I truly did. Everyone I’ve ever met has been compared to him and has fallen short. I’ve nursed so many fantasies that I knew were pathetic but I couldn’t help myself.

I don’t know him anymore, it’s true… Our lives have diverged and I don’t know if he laughs the same way anymore. But the thing was, he doesn’t know me either, and I’m so different from how I was in high school. I guess a part of me has just always hoped that one day, one day, things would finally align and he would finally see me. That although we had diverged and changed since high school, it would really be what brought us together. I’ve always felt, deep inside and I’ve never been able to get rid of it, that he was “the one.” And when he didn’t get married, when he didn’t date anyone, I saw that as confirmation.

And now he’ll be married in a month.

Part of me is angry too, that once again, love has passed me by, and I am still alone. He’s getting married and he still lives in my home town where there is nobody and yet, he’s managed to find someone. And I can’t even get a casual date.

It’s just adding to this feeling that I’ve been drowning in recently. I haven’t talked for three months to the woman I’ve considered my best friend of seven years. She and her husband came to visit family over the Fourth of July and she didn’t even called me. I’ve called her several times and she’s never returned my phone calls. How do I not take that personally? My friendship with Liz has turned so superficial since she moved out. And Chris… we’re going to be on completely different rotations starting tomorrow for the entire year. How long is it going to take before he’s a mere shadow in my life? I’m scared that I’m losing everybody, that everything that I’ve loved is just delusion. That everything that I’ve felt has just been me, and that people were just putting up with me until they could find an excuse to leave.

I hate feeling pathetic.

Wow, once again, long no update from me. Tsk tsk.

And even though it’s almost a month later…. thank you, thank you, thank you for all of your notes of congratulations about my boards. It’s been such an exhaustingly busy month that I only just realized that I never told you how much your words meant to me. You all had much more faith in my abilities and it was soul-enriching to have that faith confirmed. So *BIG HUGS* I love you all, I really do. Reading about your life and struggles and inspiration has made us friends… And there’s so much in my life, that II keep thinking of to share with you, and of course, I run out of time and don’t get to it, but please know how much you mean to me.

I just finished my rotation today, took the written final (contrary to my happy post eons ago, I still unfortunately have tests. Blah.) Yesterday, I had the practical and oral exam portion–which I thought that I blew. I knew the disease that they were quizzing me about, inside and out, but I never even mentioned the major (and only) treatment for the disease! I could have killed myself… But when I got my evaluation back today, the doctors didn’t even seem to notice! If I did well on the written (which, as always could have gone either way), I may have gotten honors. Honors! *shakes head in disbelief*

My evaluations from all of my residents basically said the same thing: I need to work on the confidence thing and take initiative… It sounds so simple, but it’s much harder to implement. I know it’s one of my weaknesses, but it’s hard to wipe away a lifetime of feeling insignificant, a part of the grey background.

Can you believe that it’s been six weeks already? The time (for the most part) flew by. The last part, the Gyn rotation was difficult. While I enjoyed the cases that I got to see and the patients that I followed on the floor (if they were admitted), it was physically hard on my body to the point that I could barely move at the end of a day. I knew that I hadn’t healed as well as I had hoped from my last surgery a year ago. I’ve had three surgeries on my right shoulder and each time it’s taken longer to get back function… I’ve got full range of motion but my strength is dismal, as I discovered when trying to hold back retractors for the surgeons for minutes and hours at end. And now, I’m starting to “feel” my other shoulder. The last CT scan showed that I had a tumor under the scapula on that side, and if I have to have surgery again, I don’t know what I’ll do. Yes, I survived Gyn, but I’ve also got 8 weeks of surgery coming up in a month and a half, where it will be the same thing–only longer and harder. I’m scared that I won’t be able to do it–that that will be my limit and the stressing factor that sends me into the spiral of more surgeries…

Enough of that. It won’t do any good worrying about it. And I’ve fretted and worried enough already. No, I really am doing good. I loved my rotation so much that it’s really lit the passion again for all of this… Medicine is truly what I love, I’m in the right spot, and somehow I’ll make it through everything.

I was asked twice on rotations if I was pregnant. Yeah. Those were great days. I’d love to blame it on the scrubs–they fit everybody ill, but… So, now I gotta add weight loss to my to-do list. *sigh* 🙂

It was Chris’s birthday on Monday. His girlfriend threw him a surprise birthday party last Friday–I was in charge of transporting him to the condo… Much amusement, especially when I had him put a towel over his head so he wouldn’t guess where we were going. The looks we got from other drivers had me in hysterical fits. It was fun. Met some of his old high school friends, which I always hate doing. I never feel more stupid than trying to make small talk with people. All of his buddies are these athletic, super smart, witty people… Seeing them, I still have no idea how Chris and I became friends… No, you think that it’s just my self-esteem issues coming out again, but really? We have so little in common sometimes, I can’t see how we got from point A to B.

Anyway, for his birthday, I made him a collage of some of his pictures from his travels and friends (trying to get on his computer and sneakily download his pics was a challenge!) and then finally, at the party got some pics of the two of us. We’ve been friends for over a year, and these are the first pics I’ve had of him And since I love sharing photos:
Chris and Julia, just click on the images. Some of them look pretty crappy–the flash only worked some of the time and I’m not clever enough with the photo editing programs to get them to look right. I’m the red-head, btw. 🙂 The one of him in Thailand is probably my favorite. It captured him perfectly when he’s trying to be charming.

And yep, that’s Melissa, his girlfriend of a year and a half now. She introduced me at the party as “Chris’s other girlfriend.” Melissa and I get along really well, I like her very much and I think she’s been fabulous for Chris, but when she says things like that, I’m never quite sure how to take it. Most of the time, she seems to be joking, taking it in stride, and then this trace of acid taints her voice and I wonder…

PS…. I heard through the rumor vines that Becka got a new job!!! Congratulations!!! I’m so excited for you. You need to give me details!

My heart is breaking….

The Unnatural is on tv and I have to go to bed. WAAAHHH! No Mulder and his fine piece of ash, no Jesse Martin… *sniff* *sigh*

I’m not liking the gyn part of my rotation as much. Too much surgery and very little patient interaction. And it’s really hard on my body, my shoulder is absolutely killing me. I hope it get better.

Just a quick note of hi before I head home for the weekend. I have (had) three whole days off, due to the 24th of July holiday. Sweeeeet! I’ve never loved my pioneer ancestors more.

Day off has been nice. Helped Chris move, cleaned my bathroom. Yep, nice and boring.

Have to run….

Pssst…. I passed my boards! 🙂

Started the morning getting yelled at by my favorite resident. Yesterday, I was supposed to see a patient, before my resident. When I went to see the patient, the chart was gone, so I assume that the resident had seen her and written in the chart. I didn’t follow up on it. Big mistake, chart basically says that the resident agreed with what I wrote–and I didn’t write anything. Resident gets chastised, and I get the load this morning. Great fun.

Ten minutes later, I was criticized again by the other resident. And then again, not five minutes later by my classmate. Little things, petty things, that normally I could have blown off.

Needless to say, the morning did not go well. By ten, I was in tears, frantic because I had to go into surgery and I knew I was going to make huge blunders.

Thank TPTB for Chris… He let me cry, calmed me down, made me laugh. Have I mentioned recently how much I love the kid? The day did get better, thank goodness. The C/S went okay, and my staples were parallel!

I’ve really admired my residents and having them think poorly of me, or think that I’m a slacker really bothers me. It’s more than just getting good recommendations, I really want them to feel like I’m helping them out, making a contribution.

Well, my motto in life is calling me: everything looks better with more sleep. Night, all.

The count so far: ~~2 tubal ligations (one that I almost passed out on… the very last stitch too, so it wasn’t like the surgery got to me. It was murderously hot in that room and the gowns are even more stifling. Luckily, I got away before I tipped over and contaminated the patient. Yep, I’m sure the doc was highly impressed.)

~~7 c/sections. I mostly blot with little clothes and try not to 1-contaminate myself (check), 2- suction at the wrong time, risking damaging internal organs (check, but everything was fine), 3-staple crooked (check, and check again), 4-get in the way(oh, yep, done that many times too). Yeah, I’m a fool in the operating room… And I keep coming back for more. I almost got to see twins, had to scrub out right before they were delivered. (sigh). Maybe this week.

~~6 births, three of them that I delivered myself. With help, of course, but it was awesome. today’s was probably the best–the doctor let me do pretty much everything. It was a girl.

Have I mentioned recently how much I love this job? Seriously. I don’t mind taking call. I don’t mind spending long hours there, because it’s fun.

There’s been some hard parts too. Little premie babies who are so young and fragile, it just makes you hurt. I hate that part, and talking to the parents whose lives completely changed in only a few short hours.

I still hate getting up at 5. 😛 Which means I have to go to bed now.

P.S. Does anybody have a copy of the song “Vindicated” from the Spiderman 2 soundtrack? Lovelove that song, and I would, as I usually do, buy it through iTunes, but for some reason, the only way you can get the song is to buy the whole album… And thank you, but no. I really don’t like the Train song and the theme just gets old. If someone has it and could somehow email/IM/post it for me, I’d love you forever. Just comment, and we can make arrangement.

*smoochies to friends out there in cyberspace* Love you guys.

Got a big white envelope in the mail this afternoon, from the National Board of Medical Examiners.

My heart seriously dropped to the bottom of my toes. I wasn’t expecting my results for at least another week. Tore the envelope open, with help from my sister (my fingers were shaking so badly) and….

I’ve been selected to participate in a survey of those who took the Boards.

Bastards. The least that they could do is put some kind of warning on the envelope that it did NOT contain Board results. Right now, I honestly think I don’t want to know.

It’s just been one of those days. Matt came by today, to drop off some books I lent him… I haven’t seen him for a couple of months now, and thought that he was purged from the system. Nope. Got that whole twittery, gut on the floor (hey, that’s twice today. Must be a record) at his voice and he’s looking good. Too good. And when he said that he had missed seeing me…. Guh. It’s so hard to remind myself that this crush of two years hasn’t progressed at all and isn’t going to. He’s either not interested (most likely) or just pathologically shy and it’s not going to change. Period.

And of course, my face chose today to break out and I was wearing my greasy glasses to give my poor eyes a break. I’m sure I looked fabulous.

Saw Spiderman with Chris and Melissa. They didn’t like it so much… I did. Well, except for the scene where the doctors and nurses were all killed–that was a little too graphic. I remember with the first one, the first time I saw it, I didn’t like it so much because of the clichéd writing, but got over it after reading that that was the point–to make it sound like it came from the comic books. That was their complaint today. Ah, well, next time I’ll see it with a more sympathetic crowd.

Rotations are going great. I’ve seen a couple of births and a c-sections and followed several patients in “my care.” Next week, I’m hoping to actually “catch the baby” and deliver it (with help of course). Birth is amazing, and I really like being around patients like this–mostly healthy, young women about my age and then being able to participate in this special time of their lives. Who knows, maybe I’ll end up going into OB, it’s definitely on the list to consider now. I have call on Monday night and then all of Saturday. I hope I can handle it! Me being up for more than 24 hours seems like a bad idea.

My first day of playing doctor went a lot better than I thought it would. In fact, for the first time, I’m actually really really excited to be starting my rotations, I’ve been dreading them for so long…. Mostly orientation today, but I learned how to birth a (fake) baby and monitor labor. And I met my resident who seems really nice (I’ve heard so many evil!resident stories that would curl your toes) and willing to help us learn–I breathed a big sigh of relief after that. We made our call schedule–I only have 5 nights on call–and I get to go home afterwards!! I’m done pretty much every day by 5:30 (although I start at 5:30 am–still, I thought I’d be spending 18 hours at the hospital every day, this seems like the life of luxury!) And best of all–I get (most) weekends off!!

And tomorrow–tomorrow I scrub in for my first cesarean section!! I can’t wait!

Going to bed at ten seems like a crime, but alas, I must away. Night all!

Me other friendsies:

jcd1013 and _flutter share 0 interests.
jcd1013 and _starsinhereyes share 30 interests.
jcd1013 and avidtvfan share 6 interests.
jcd1013 and behrbemine share 12 interests.
jcd1013 and bjorks_defender share 7 interests.
jcd1013 and claidheamhmor share 12 interests.
jcd1013 and educatedtvgeek share 0 interests.
jcd1013 and fileg share 7 interests.
jcd1013 and frodo_story share 0 interests.
jcd1013 and igbykat share 7 interests.
jcd1013 and kimarama share 7 interests.
jcd1013 and mrschimpf share 5 interests.
jcd1013 and roxybluegirl7 share 5 interests.
jcd1013 and shirerain share 34 interests.
jcd1013 and watcher_junior share 2 interests.

I am sooooo loving my week off!! Just got back from North Carolina… Had a wonderful time, hanging out with Sam and her boyfriend and her roommate. Fort Bragg was not quite like I expected, but then I’m always surprised by new places. It wasn’t as hot and humid as Sam had threatened–but then it rained most of the time, keeping it pretty cool. She showed me her new place that she’s moving into in a week, and it made me go lusty. It’s a real house–two stories, with enough rooms that a vagabond could take a room downstairs and they’d never even realize it. And it has a patio, and living room and formal sitting room, with hardwood floors. I’m so in love with it–I want a real house so badly, with a real sofa–no more apartments. I’m thinking about doing my family practice rotation there, and Sam’s offered to let me stay with her… It would be so fantastic.

Didn’t meet all of the cute boys that Sam promised me. No, I take that back. I did meet a few, but they were very inebriated (I have no idea how they managed to drive themselves to the bar) and maybe I am a prude, but I prefer to be remembered for at least a few minutes… And, really, the military haircut looks good on very few. The uniform–hot. Crewcuts–not so much.

But I’m off again in an hour. My parents and I are going camping for a few days up in Wyoming. We haven’t been on a family vacation in years, and neither of my sisters could get work off, so it’s just the three of us. We’re just wandering over the state, exploring some of the mountains that we’ve missed. It’ll be nice and relaxing… I tend to write on vacations, so I’m bringing along a notebook and my drabble book. Here’s hoping that LNB manages to find its way to paper!

Ciao!

For better or worse, the test is done. It was hard, really hard with lots of stuff that I hadn’t even considered studying. And I was extremely tired, since I slept poorly last night, worrying that I didn’t know enough. I have no idea how I did. Some I felt good about–others, I couldn’t even eliminate one choice. Chris thinks he failed. I just hope I didn’t. 🙂

Off to North Carolina in four hours, and I haven’t packed!

Just a note to let you know I won’t be around for the next week. Right now, with only five days left, there’s absolutely no way that I’ll be passing the test, much less doing well enough to get me into a good residency. So my studying is being bumped to about 15 hours a day and I’ll be a frantic hermit. I’m about three steps away from a glorified breakdown as it is…

I hate this. So much. I’m starting to have nightmares–my kind, where I don’t hear my alarm clock and sleep in and miss the test. where I forget to leave my cell phone outside and they tell me I can’t take the test, and where I have names of drugs running over and over in my head.

I’ve neglected all of you horribly lately, I hope you can all be patient and forgive me. {{{{HUGS}}}}} to all. You are all so amazing that just knowing that you guys are cheering me on gives me happiness.

Okay, back to the books. I can use all the good luck, wishes, karma, prayers that you are willing to send my way. 🙂

Two weeks of studying all day, every day. I’ve read the entire review book, gone back and filled in missing information. Rememorized the Kreb cycle, found out that patients with sickle cell disease are more prone to infections with Salmonella in their bones, tried to learn the side effects of a whole bunch of drugs. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

And it’s not doing any good.

I’ve been taking practice tests for the past two days. And getting around 60%–which was about what I was doing before I started the studying schedule. Today’s: 50%. Fifty percent! I’m doing worse than before!

Example question:

An obese patient is brought into the emergency room in shock and in need of intravenous fluids. No superficial veins can be seen or palpated. The emergency room physician decides to make an incision to locate the great saphenous vein for the insertion of a cannula (“saphenous cutdown”). In which of the following locations should the incision be made?

A. Anterior to the lateral malleolus

B. Anterior to the medial malleolus

C. On the dorsum of the foot, lateral to the extensor hallucis longus tendon

D. Posterior to the lateral malleolus

E. Posterior to the medial malleolus

Answer is B. Missing it is not the bad part (I thought it was D). The bad part is I didn’t even know where the medial malleolus was! I thought it was the knee. No, It’s the bony part of the ankle. And though I know it’s foreign to anyone who hasn’t taken anatomy–it really is a basic concept in anatomy, one that I should have known.

Yeah, this is good.

10 days… I am so screwed.

Chris emailed M—- this morning and got back an email that said she had already talked to Dr. B— and admitted her error of “laziness.” So it looks like we won’t have to do another paper and there’s no hard feelings or uncomfortableness. I am relieved. I hate thinking that people are out to get me–and at least in this case, it looks like an honest (although pathetically stupid) misunderstanding.

Spent most of the evening tracking down new icons. I’m like Oliver!–I want more, sir! I’ve got another dozen that I couldn’t use, and I keep thinking of more that I want. The Simpsons–I keep thinking I would die to have an animated one of “Lisa the Tree Hugger” and the five-star vegetarian or one of Homer and Maggie, Get Fuzzy, or Calvin n Hobbes for humor. Some more Anne ones. A pen and quill. Maybe a Harry Potter drawing, etc, etc, etc. Yes, folks this is how Julia procrastinates studying how the complement system works.